REVIEW COLLECTION: “Scary Movie” series

(Courtesy Wikipedia) 

Scary Movie (2000) 

The late-90s saw a resurgence in the horror genre, thanks to groundbreaking entries like the meta satire Scream, the old-school slasher I Know What You Did Last Summer, the supernatural The Sixth Sense, and the found footage feature The Blair Witch Project. Right at the turn of the century, the Wayans siblings (namely Keenan Ivory, Shawn, and Marlon, from In Living Color and The Wayans Bros) captured this period in the pop culture zeitgeist with an outrageous sendup of these titles, making fun of the numerous cliches, tropes, convoluted plot points, and reported “stupidity” often seen within the genre. It was advertised as “from the people who had nothing to do with Scream,” despite being released by the same distributor (the former Miramax label, Dimension Films). 

Scary Movie (which, ironically, was once the original title for Scream) mostly lampoons the plots of Wes Craven’s 1996 flick and its first sequel (the third entry in that series was release the same year as this “spoof of a satire,” as Keenan described it), while also blending in now-iconic moments from films like The Matrix and The Usual Suspects, TV shows like Dawson’s Creek, and the ever-popular “Wassup” gang from the famous Budweiser commercials of the time (the latter of which may be the highlight of this movie). Even the iconic Blair Witch image is featured in the A of the film’s title, complete with boxer briefs. Character archetypes from Scream include Anna Faris (making her film debut) in for Neve Campbell, Jon Abrahams for Skeet Ulrich, Carmen Electra for Drew Barrymore (recreating that horrifying opening scene, but with jabs at Shaquille O’Neil’s role in Kazaam), and Cheri Oteri’s takedown of Courtney Cox. 

To be fair, Scary Movie does have some laughs. Lochlyn Munro is hilarious as a send-up of Ryan Philippe from I Know What You Did Last Summer. One of the funniest scenes is a recreation of that movie’s initial incident. (“We hit a boot!” “Where’s the foot?!?”) I find it equally amusing that Shannon Elizabeth’s parody of Sarah Michelle Gellar from that same movie is named Buffy (named after Gellar’s famous “vampire slayer” on TV). A few visual gags recall the work of David & Jerry Zucker and Jim Abrahams (Airplane!, The Naked Gun). Even the way the Killer’s “Ghostface” mask randomly changes is silly. Bits that break the fourth wall include Faris getting hit in the face with a camera, Abrahams directly pointing out the crew behind the scenes, and characters making clever references to actors in their 20s and 30s who are cast in teenage roles in horror movies. And let’s not forget Shawn Wayans’ hilarious spit take. 

But the movie is also so unbelievably raunchy and sometimes mean-spirited. Released one year after Mike Myers’ Austin Powers sequel and the feature-length version of South Park, Scary Movie revels in scatological humor and crude sexual content, with at least three or four moments that you won’t believe got pass the ratings board (i.e., moments involving plastic genitals, and a lengthy sex scene that goes way too far; certain deleted scenes on the DVD/Blu-ray releases are just as, if not more, explicit). The “Ghostface”-esque killer (with a Beetlejuice-like voice) is a pervert who stabs out a breast cup in the opening scene. Kurt Fuller’s police chief, while amusing, is a strange man with an affinity for underwear modeling. There’s also a gender-bending coach with a dangling scrotum, as well as jokes about homosexuality (Shawn Wayans’ school jock Ray is a not-so-closeted gay guy) and oral sex. Marlon Wayans’ Shorty is a pothead who inadvertently gets the Killer in on his stash, gets him to freestyle rap, and elsewhere explains his “rules” for surviving hit-and-runs; “certain rules” in the film’s trailer were more clever. On that same note, Cindy’s dad apparently hoards drugs, while Regina Hall’s Brenda makes now-outdated references to Sean “Puff Daddy” Combs.

Sometimes, you don’t know whether to laugh or groan. The latter is especially true when it comes to ruthless jokes about (and offensive portrayals of) mentally challenged people, suicide, and physical violence (some wince-inducing) against children, women, the elderly, and overweight people. An unfunny (and apparently racist) death scene takes place in a movie theater. Song lyrics on the film’s soundtrack are sexist, violent, and obscene. In the end, Scary Movie may have mind-boggling layers of meta humor upon meta humor. But it’s an outcome that pushes the envelopes of foolishness and crudity to an extreme. Consider this an example of the kind of movie your parents didn’t/wouldn’t want you to see. 

Scary Movie 2 (2001) 

The tagline for the original Scary Movie read, “No mercy. No shame. No sequel.” When studio executives immediately greenlit a sequel and Shawn Wayans was told about this tagline in a later interview, he jokingly commented that they would mention on the posters for the second movie, “We lied.” Keenan Ivory Wayans returns to the director’s chair, with brothers Shawn and Marlon back as co-writers and co-stars (as the bisexual Ray and pothead Shorty, respectively), in a send up of haunted house movies. More specifically, the supernatural subgenre of horror. 

Scary Movie 2 parodies everything from The Exorcist to The Amityville Horror and Poltergeist, as well as recent entries of the time, like Hannibal, Hollow Man, What Lies Beneath, and even the non-horror Charlie’s Angels. Along with Anna Faris’s Cindy Campbell (now in college), Regina Hall’s Brenda makes a return, as do characters that were supposedly killed off in the last movie. A deleted scene that ended up in one of the trailers has Cindy asking Ray what he’s doing there, to which he responds (in meta fashion), “It’s the sequel.” Another deleted scene had Shorty interacting with a Wilson volleyball a la Cast Away (an image that made up the O of the film’s title in the main poster). The “plot” involves the remaining “survivors” being asked by Tim Curry’s college professor and David Cross’s wheelchair-bound scientist to be a part of a weekend experiment at an old mansion. 

There are maybe four or five bits that actually work in this flick, including Brenda objecting to the genre cliché of Caucasian people saying, “Let’s split up,” Ray running in slow-motion and then super fast (“I broke my fall”), and behind-the-scenes pictures over the end credits. The best one of all is a moment that spoofs a popular Nike commercial of the time, where characters take turns dribbling a basketball in rhythm. For the most part, however, Scary Movie 2 was the result of a rushed production. The Wayans did admit, in retrospect, that this second movie wasn’t as strong or as good, due to its short production period. More than that, this inferior installment is just as scatological and obscene as the first, but with even more gross-out humor and bodily fluids thrown everywhere. Literally. 

The opening parody of The Exorcist (a first since, perhaps, Leslie Nielsen’s version from Repossessed) features James Woods and Andy Richter as priests trying to remove a demon from Natasha Lyonne’s possessed girl. Ending in tragedy, this opening blatantly mocks religion and Christianity, and sets in motion a parade of tasteless humor and visual references to sexual molesting (a later bit turns the tables on a Poltergeist-like clown) and other sickening sexual content (i.e., jokes about oral sex). The MPAA’s reasons for the film’s R-rating were “strong sexual and gross humor, graphic language and some drug content.” Speaking of the latter, Shorty (who has a larger role—and bigger hair—in this movie) gets attacked by a giant plant a la Poltergeist that rolls him up into a giant doobie. Add to that harsh comments about people with physical disabilities, animal abuse, a creepy caretaker (Chris Elliot) who makes unwanted advances, and an obnoxious, foul-mouthed parrot. 

Following this movie’s underwhelming release, the studio decided to hire a different crew for a third entry (which would come out two years later). The Wayans, meanwhile, went on to make the rich-girl socialite satire White Chicks (which featured Shawn and Marlon as undercover cops masquerading as Caucasian heiresses). While trashed by critics at the time, it has since become a cult classic. The following decade, Marlon created his own paranormal comedy, aptly named A Haunted House, which was followed by one sequel. Talk about history repeating itself. And that's no lie. 

Scary Movie 3 (2003) 

In his review for the third entry in this horror-parody series, Roger Ebert mentioned the difference between a spoof and a satire. Merriam-Webster’s dictionary defines each as follows: a spoof is “to make good-natured fun of,” or “a light humorous parody,” whereas a satire is “a literary work holding up human vices and follies to ridicule or scorn” and “trenchant wit, irony, or sarcasm used to expose and discredit vice or folly.” 

Succeeding the Wayans, David Zucker (months after helming the poorly-received My Boss’s Daughter for Dimension Films) took up directing duties for Scary Movie 3, this time poking fun at The Ring, Signs, and even 8 Mile. (Interestingly, Eminem contributed to the first Scary Movie’s soundtrack.) Zucker also reunited with producer Robert K. Weiss (Airplane!, The Naked Gun series) and co-writer Pat Proft (who wrote this script with Craig Mazin). Anna Faris and Regina Hall were the only actors from the first two installments to reprise their respective roles. Faris’s Cindy Campbell (sporting blond hair a la Naomi Watts) is now a news reporter who discovers a mysterious videotape (the O in the TV makes up the O in the film's title this time), as well as crop circles that have been appearing at a local farm. Meanwhile, her nephew has been having disturbing if awkward visions and drawing scary pictures, while Hall’s Brenda Meeks (her friend) suspects something crazy is about to happen. And she’s not wrong. 

This third entry otherwise has a mostly new cast. This includes Charlie Sheen (a veteran of parody with Jim Abrahams’ Hot Shots duology) sending up Mel Gibson from Signs, a standout Simon Rex as a wannabe rapper a la Eminem, Anthony Anderson as his Mekhi Pfeiffer, comedian Kevin Hart (in one of his first film credits) as another of their buddies, Camryn Mannheim as a local sheriff, Jenny McCarthy and Pamela Anderson as two dumb blondes who watch the infamous videotape, and Eddie Griffin and Queen Latifah as Matrix characters somehow connected to all of the other plot threads. Plus, many famous hip-hop artists and comedians make cameo appearances. But perhaps, best of all, in his first reunion with Zucker and company in almost a decade, Leslie Nielsen plays as a paranoid U.S. President, panicking over aliens from space a la Invasion of the Body Snatchers. 

The movie does have some scenes of clever wordplay and/or visual gags, including some fourth wall credits, one scene involving a mishap with a news station teleprompter; another, aluminum hats shaped like Hershey’s Kisses; and a clever Harrison Ford reference (whom Nielsen parodied in Wrongfully Accused). The naturally-funny Nielsen even recites one of his famous lines from Airplane during a critical moment. This also marked the first time a Scary Movie received a PG-13 rating from the MPAA, to apparently attract a wider audience. Still, an unrated version of the movie was later released on DVD and home video. (WRITER’S NOTE: this was the version I watched when reviewing. Same with the fourth movie.) 

Although there’s no explicit content like the first two movies had, it still feels like some scenes in this third one border on an R-rating, with mean-spirited pratfalls (many involving children) and unhinged slapstick (including an outrageous scene at a funeral parlor, and pranks about nose bleeds and seizures). Suggestive/sexual references (like girls in cleavage-baring outfits, canines humping, and jokes about sex, homosexuality, and breast size) and bizarre bodily imagery are one thing. But it’s another thing when it comes to unsettling references to pedophilia (including one weird “appearance” that spoofs The Others), workplace harassment, and other political incorrectness (i.e, racist jokes, obscene song lyrics). Even George Carlin’s cameo—a cross between the architect from The Matrix Reloaded and Brian Cox from The Ring—comes across as predatory. By this point, the series was slowly becoming a little less about horror movies and as much about other pop culture references it was parodying. In short, to paraphrase Ebert, they were becoming more like spoofs than satires. 

Scary Movie 4 (2006) 

David Zucker returned to the director’s chair, as did co-writer and frequent collaborators Pat Proft and Jim Abrahams, for a fourth Scary Movie. A joint production of Miramax and subsidiary Dimension Films, this was the first franchise entry released under the Weinstein Company label. By this point, Anna Faris (as blond bimbo Cindy Campbell) and Regina Hall (as the smart-mouthed Brenda Meeks) were the only actors to have appeared in every installment. This time, they were joined by returning franchise members Anthony Anderson, Carmen Electra, Chris Elliot, Kevin Hart, Leslie Nielsen, Simon Rex, and Charlie Sheen. (Electra and Elliot are the only two of these who played different roles, while the rest were recurring.) 

Like its predecessor, this sequel leans into sci-fi-horror, as well as supernatural and splatter, lampooning everything from War of the Worlds to The Grudge, Saw, and The Village. Graig Bierko’s sendup of Tom Cruise from the former is a standout, as is Michael Madsen’s spoof of Tim Robbins from that same blockbuster. An opening spoof of Saw centers on the unlikely pairing of NBA superstar Shaquille O’Neil (who was referenced in the first movie) and TV psychiatrist Dr. Phil McGraw. Then there’s James Earl Jones’ narration, as well as the presence of Bill Pullman (in his first parody movie since Spaceballs?), who ironically had a small role in The Grudge remake. 

In the end, Scary Movie 4 feels like a series of numerous parodies in a weird, illogical, non-satirical, unhinged “plot” that strangely connects everything, including moments that send up non-horror features like Brokeback Mountain and Million Dollar Baby. Some witty banter (i.e., zombies, car locks, and unspoken creatures), non sequiturs, and visual gags (like the initial form of the “triPods”) work. But the experience is ruined by unfunny jokes about suicide and abortion, and frequent scatological (sometimes gross-out) gags centered on rear ends and homosexuality. 

Add to that some appearances by former Playboy models, references to now-controversial music artists (i.e., R. Kelly), and ruthless if subtle gags about former U.S. President George W. Bush, late singer Michael Jackson, brash boxer Mike Tyson, Cruise’s infamous outburst on Oprah Winfrey’s talk show one year prior, the elderly, and mentally challenged people. That goes just as well for an off-color, outdated scene involving the United Nations (complete with insane, gratuitous nudity). Ditto mean-spirited comic violence against children, another sequence involving neck-breaking, and another involving a crashed plane. 

That same year, Aaron Seltzer & Jason Friedberg (credited as co-writers of the first Scary Movie, as well as the 90s Leslie Nielsen vehicle Spy Hard) released their first of many parodies-for-the-sake-of-parodies: the poorly received Date Movie. This was followed by the equally reviled entries Epic Movie, Meet the Spartans, Disaster Movie, and Vampires Suck. As for Nielsen, he continued performing in parody movies for the next few years, including David Zucker’s political satire An American Carol and the aptly named Superhero Movie in 2008, before the actor’s untimely passing two years later. The Wayans Brothers, meanwhile, made two other movies during this time: the raunchy caper Little Man (where Marlon’s pint-sized crook pretends to be a baby to Shawn’s wannabe dad to retrieve a prized jewel) and the farcical Dance Flick (in which Damon Jr. ridiculously mentors an aspiring dancer in a send-up of Save the Last Dance, Stomp the Yard, and other dancing pictures). (I've not seen either of these movies, as of this writing.) The siblings haven’t worked together on a movie since then. (Until recently, that is.) 

Scary Movie V (2013) 

David Zucker and Pat Proft collaborated as writers once again for a fifth installment (and attempted reboot) of Scary Movie. Former Disney Channel star Ashley Tisdale leads a mostly new cast—with the exception of franchise veterans like Darryl Hammond, Simon Rex, and Molly Shannon (albeit different roles)—in parodies of Cabin in the Woods, Mama, Black Swan, and the remake of Evil Dead, as well as Inception, Rise of the Planet of the Apes (what?), Tyler Perry’s Madea movies, and the controversial novel 50 Shades of Grey. 

Right off the bat, this critical and commercial failure didn’t do any favors for anybody involved, wasting an otherwise stacked cast. This includes Charlie Sheen and Lindsey Lohan, who spoof Paranormal Activity in an opening scene. Both were facing public scrutiny and going through personal issues at the time, and it feels cringy to see each of them mocking their respective bad raps. [WRITER’S NOTE: Both seem to be doing much better these days, with Sheen reportedly sober since 2017 and with a new Netflix documentary out in September. Lohan, meanwhile, has been making holiday movies for the same streamer since 2022, and now co-stars with Jamie Lee Curtis in a long-awaited sequel to Disney's 2003 remake of Freaky Friday.] 

Scary Movie V drowns in jokes about molestation, bestiality, erotica, male anatomy, eating disorders, racism, marijuana use, feces, and onstage pregnancies. Children and minorities are the butt of mean-spirited comic violence (ditto a scene of gore that blatantly mocks Christianity). This level of “humor” is forced, unhinged, gross-out, and downright horrible. It’s unbelievable that this movie got away with a PG-13 rating, which it never should’ve received to begin with. Plus, Tisdale’s character (a sendup of Jessica Chastain from Mama and Natalie Portman from Black Swan) is so arrogant and unlikable. 

Director Malcolm D. Lee later disowned this movie. (Zucker directed reshoots and additional material, which reportedly made up 60% of the finished product.) As such, Scary Movie V not only feels like a series of parodies that are passively stitched together. (One character even says, “I have no idea what that was,” as if speaking for the audience.) They’re downright unfunny, tasteless, and offensive. This flick has more in common with the much-reviled spoof pictures that Aaron Seltzer and Jason Friedberg were making since 2006 (when the previous Scary Movie was released), than it does with what the Wayans’s and Zucker, respectively, did previously. And that’s saying something. Not even outtakes during the end credits can make up for what came before them. Talk about running a franchise into the ground. (Jaws 4, anybody?) 

The only thing I did find mildly amusing was Ben Cornish’s spot-on impersonation of Leonardo DiCaprio from Inception. Other than that, nothing in this unnecessary and meaningless installment that nobody apparently asked for (let alone was interested in) is even remotely hilarious, bringing this agreeably-declining series—and the then-oversaturated spoof genre—to an all-time low. Seeing this once is more than enough. To everyone else, please skip. In trailers, Sheen declares, “I’ve come back from worse than this.” (Maybe there’s some truth in that?) I can only imagine how outrageous and unhinged the Wayans are going to be with the newest (sixth) iteration next year. At the same time, I anticipate a method to their madness, which this series didn’t have with the fifth entry. But that’s far from an endorsement.